Day 39, It’s over!

All good things must come to an end and so it is with my "vacation". The FedEx guy just showed up at my door bearing the magic envelope so if all goes as planned, I will be sitting at my desk, once again a member of the working poor, as of Tuesday, September 30. Appropriately, that will be Day 42.

Day 38 To Do list

Things I should do today:

1. Clean out the fridge so I can...
2. Put away groceries I bought today
3. Cut up the watermelon that is taking up half the fridge
4. Finish going through the hallway bookshelf and sorting through the trash/rummage/keep piles
5. Do same with bedroom bookshelf (the contents of which are currently all over the floor because I was looking for something in a mad panic)
6. Go through the big pile of rummage by the back door and figure out who to dump it on, I mean donate it to
7. Apply for 2 more jobs so I can file for unemployment again

Things I will probably do instead:

1. Drive to Hunt Valley for meatzels (done!)
2. Catch up on Wordscraper games (done!)
3. Blog (working on it)
4. Level my priest some more
   

Day 38

So not so much a phone interview as a 10-minute phone screen…

I think I nailed the interview portion with my speech on how I will bring about world peace through a hybridization of Scrum and Waterfall methodologies but I'm sure I lost points in the swimsuit round. We'll see if I make it to the semifinals with Miss Austin, Texas and Miss Marin County, California. I hope that bitch, Miss South Carolina, doesn't steal my spot again.

Day 37

I have stopped waiting for the fedex guy, now that I know the paperwork, unlike Elvis, has not yet left the building. I called and checked after the 4th IM/text message/email saying, "Hey! I hear you start on Monday! they are already setting up your computer." Well, at least IT is efficient...

Observations from Day 36

1. Leaving the house for an hour and a half will not make the fedex guy show up but at least you will have some new bras to show for it from the trip to walmart
   
2. Many things sound like a fedex truck when you have your back to the front door and are trying to pretend you aren't listening for the fedex truck. Such as:
   
   1. Newspaper delivery guy
      
   2. Heating oil delivery guy
      
   3. Schoolbus
      
   4. Mailman
      
   5. Neighbor across the street whose civic needs a tune-up
      
   6. Your hopes and dreams being dashed on the rocks of despair

Day 36

It turns out, what I am waiting for is not an email or a phone call but a FedEx package. So the phone/email checking behavior bordering on OCD has now become FedEx guy stalking behavior. And because the universe just can't help but fuck with me just a little, not 5 minutes after I found out I was waiting for FedEx, the UPS guy shows up at my door. I get all excited as he is walking down the path, thinking they must use UPS overnight because it is cheaper (how efficient of them) but no. It is the charcoal chimney I ordered on Sunday because ours fell apart. sigh.

Day 35

So the kick ass cover letter may actually have done its job. I sent it to a company that had no jobs listed on its website I was even remotely qualified for and Presto! A week later, I get an email from them asking me if would like to have a phone interview with them. Now I won't get into the fact that this company is less than half an hour from my house and 5 minutes from all the other game companies in Hunt Valley but I guess they need to protect themselves from the average psycho game developer who might, if give an in person interview, lose their minds and go on a rampage, knocking over action figures and tearing down Guitar Hero 2 posters from random cube walls. But there is nothing about a phone interview that physically prevents the candidate from calling the director of HR a skank ho so it still has its risks.

Still no written offer and to appear as if I was not obsessively checking my email every 5 minutes I spent the morning cleaning out my inbox and organizing a list of all the job applications I have sent just in case the unemployment people decide to come check up on me. It is amazing how many people have been offered the benefit of my vast array of talents and yet have not even bothered to reply. I can only assume they are paralyzed by my brilliance.